


Two Become One

by cheile (Cheile)



Series: Kathryn's Rainbow [1]
Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Childhood Memories, F/M, First Dates, First Time, Heirlooms, Weddings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-20
Updated: 2015-09-20
Packaged: 2018-04-22 11:48:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,130
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4834202
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cheile/pseuds/cheile
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The day after Tom and B'Elanna's wedding, the command team's first official date leads to much more.</p><p>[revamp of a VERY old story - revision originally posted 2008]</p>
            </blockquote>





	Two Become One

**Author's Note:**

> Author's note: Many years ago, a combination of listening to too much Spice Girls and a nannying job put this idea into my head. When canon began going seriously downhill, I lost heart and abandoned it. Eventually, I decided to try picking up where I left off--and found that I had to begin again....from the beginning.
> 
> Spoilers/references: Random events from the first four seasons and very beginning of fifth. The timeline for this story and those soon to accompany it officially parts from canon not long after fifth season's "Night". (And yes, I stole the vows from "Course: Oblivion". They were too perfect not to use.)
> 
> Thanks: To all of the dedicated Rainbow readers--for sticking with me for these ten long years, through the original drafts and now into the improved versions! To my VAMBie crew, for bringing me back into the fold. Extra thanks to Katesfire, Maja and Cori-sis for beta-reading, and Elem for pulling my ass outta writers' rut several times!
> 
> Dedication: Many thanks especially to Fox, a special dedicated FFN reader without whose patience and constructive criticism, the revisions would never have taken place.

 

It was proving to be an uneventful day, without alien attacks, strange phenomena or freak ion storms to provide any major hassles for the crew of Starfleet's lone ship in the Delta Quadrant. Having left Malon space a month prior, they had finally entered a quieter sector. Its few star systems were mostly uninhabited, which meant there would be the possibility of fewer emergencies to interrupt the wedding of two of Voyager's senior staff.

Holodeck One's scenery was set to what could have been any of Earth's beaches in the Caribbean--white sand, towering coconut palms, crystal blue sky and clear turquoise waters. A light breeze was blowing, rustling the palm fronds and bringing the scent of the sea with it.

The soon-to-be-wedded couple and attending crew were gathered near the beach's center, a few meters from the shoreline where the tide gently caressed the white sands.

Fighting a sudden stab of nerves, the groom looked aside for a moment before lifting his gaze to meet his bride's. "I still don't know what I've done to deserve you....but whatever it is, I'll try to keep doing it. And I promise to stand by you, to honor you, till death do us part."

For her part, the bride seemed like she was just as nervous, but she never once looked away from her companion's face. "You stood by me when most people would have run for the nearest airlock." A wave of gentle laughter rippled through the watching guests. "You were willing to see past my shortcomings, and to take all the bumps and bruises that came along with it. You made me a better person....even though I put up one hell of a fight." A rueful smile touched her lips momentarily, then her face grew serious once more. "I look forward to our journey together."

"You may kiss the bride."

Kathryn Janeway, Voyager's captain, smiled as she watched Tom and B'Elanna kiss. If she'd been told at the start of this journey that these two would be Voyager's first married couple, she would have laughed at the very thought. How far these two had come--from enemies to flirting friends to lovers, and now husband and wife. She couldn't have been happier for them.

She glanced over at her tall, darkly handsome first officer, who had given the bride away, and raised an eyebrow at him. Chakotay shrugged in response.

"I told you so," she mouthed.

He gave her a full-dimpled grin and shrugged again.

Kathryn shook her head. _You're incorrigible_ , her look told him.

 _I know_ , his look answered.

Their silent conversation was interrupted as she reached the couple and was immediately snatched up in an effusive hug by Tom Paris. "Congratulations, Tom."

"Thank you, Captain. If it hadn't been for your faith in me, I wouldn't be standing here today." She thought she heard a slight catch in his voice, but when he released her from the hug, only his pure happiness was evident on his face.

She smiled at him, squeezing his shoulder, then moved to B'Elanna. Her hug was less crushing, but filled with the same gratitude as Tom's. "Thank you, Captain."

"No thanks necessary. I'm glad to see you so happy. Both of you."

They separated from the hug and B'Elanna looked up at Tom with shining eyes. He smiled down at her gently. "Shall we head for the garden, Mrs. Paris?"

She nodded and, taking his hand, they headed up the slope of the beach towards the lawn where the tables were set up. Kathryn watched them go, noticing as other crewmembers eventually followed the newlyweds that a few were in groups, but many were also in pairs. Joe Carey was walking with Samantha Wildman, Naomi skipping along on her mother's other side. Crewman Golwat was accompanied by her fellow Bolian, Chell, as he chattered at his usual speed of warp five--no doubt about the dishes he'd contributed to the reception. Lieutenant Rollins had offered his arm to one of the Delaneys--she was certain it was Jenny. Meanwhile, Gerron Tem was escorting Megan towards the garden. Even Vorik was not walking alone, accompanied by a quiet young female ensign with light brown hair. Kathryn recognized her as Deirdre Hale from Sciences.

"Now you know that no matter whose wedding it is, Neelix will refuse to start the reception without you." Chakotay's teasing voice pulled her from her reverie.

"And it doesn't matter how many times I tell him not to hold things up for me, he does it anyway." Kathryn shook her head in amusement at the recollection of how many times she'd had that argument with the cheerful, but stubborn, little Talaxian. Another glance around the beach proved that the rest of the crew who'd attended the ceremony were already gone or heading up the last rise into the garden, leaving her and Chakotay alone.

He cast a glance around, obviously noticing the same thing. "Looks like someone needs an escort to the reception. May I?" He offered her his arm.

Kathryn laughed. "Certainly, Commander."

 

**=/\= **=/\=**   **=/\=**   **=/\=****

 

The reception area was part of one of the most basic holodeck programs in existence--a large English rose garden, complete with walking paths, but a large clear area in the center had been added to accommodate tables.

The next hour or so passed in a whirl of toasts, teasing, and laughter. After everyone had taken their time to appreciate the combined cooking efforts of Neelix, Chell and Ensign Harper, it was time for the cake. Harper had taken it upon herself to make the cake while refusing to let Neelix or Chell see it or know what it looked like. It was unveiled to gasps of astonishment and applause. Delicately drawn on the cake's surface was an image of Voyager, with Tom and B'Elanna in the center.

"Wait! No one touch it yet!" Susan Nicoletti ducked in front of Harper to snap a couple of shots with her holo-imager. "Now one of you by the cake, Jade." Nicoletti ushered Harper back into place by the cake for another photo before they both moved out of the way for the cake cutting.

Tom's hand slipped a little when he was giving B'Elanna the small piece of cake and got a small smear of frosting across her cheek. At first, it appeared that she didn't seem to mind. However, that was soon proven not to be true, because when she fed Tom his piece in return, he had no chance to get anything more than a taste before she smeared the rest across his face. Everyone laughed.

"Would you look at that? Barely married an hour and she's abusing me already," Tom complained, which only garnered more laughter from the gathered crew. He tried to scowl at his bride as he scrubbed the frosting off his cheeks with the rag Neelix offered him, but the effect was lost when he couldn't help but laugh a little himself.

"Better make sure she doesn't have painsticks hidden in the honeymoon luggage, Tom." Harry Kim, Voyager's ops officer and Tom's best friend, did his best to hide his own grin when B'Elanna shot a glower his way.

"Oh, he's in for it now." The stage-whispered comment was heard clearly over the laughter and other whispered remarks, and everyone waited for the pilot's retort and the possible battle of verbal taunts. But surprisingly, the one to answer was the crew's former Borg.

"Your knowledge of Klingon mating practices is inadequate and erroneous, Ensign Kim." Seven of Nine's baby blue eyes met Harry's shocked stare with her usual nonchalance. "Pain sticks are used as an aphrodisiac to excite the participant _prior_ to consummating--"

"Okay, Seven--I get the idea." A blush was fast rising on Harry's face.

"Yeah, Harry, shouldn't you be studying Borg mating practices?" The helmsman was the one to grin this time as Harry's face slowly began to turn several shades of crimson.

Seven arched an eyebrow in a very Vulcanesque manner at Tom. "The Borg do not mate, Lieutenant Paris. We assimilate."

A sly look crossed Tom's face. "Well, in that case--"

"Tom."

"Yes, 'Lanna?"

"Shut up." Another wave of laughter echoed through the holodeck. As it died down, B'Elanna started to pull Tom towards the unoccupied dance floor. "Stop harassing your best man and dance with me, Lieutenant."

Tom gave the surrounding crew a "what can I do?" look that was completely ruined by his "gotta love her" grin and let himself be dragged away. "Yes, ma'am."

As the leftovers were cleared away, Jenny Delaney settled herself into the holographic DJ booth. First, she selected a waltz for the new couple to dance to alone. Then she punched in commands for the computer to randomly select romantic tracks from the database and, at Rollins' urging, hopped down to enjoy a dance with him. Megan and Gerron were next on the floor, and other couples followed.

Kathryn watched the crew interact, again noticing how those who she had originally seen paired off seemed to stick together, though occasionally sharing dances with others.

While Chakotay and B'Elanna shared what took the place of a father/daughter dance, Tom snagged Kathryn from the sidelines.

"At the risk of repeating myself, thank you again for everything."

"No thanks necessary. It makes me happy to see you happy," she emphasized.

 _But I bet I know what would make you happier,_ the newly married helmsman thought to himself. As they danced, he watched his beloved in the arms of the first officer and idly wondered if there couldn't be some way to nudge his commanding officers in the much-needed right direction. Tom knew the captain had spoken the truth about gaining happiness through seeing her crew happy, but he decided it was high time that she had some happiness of her own.

"Penny for your thoughts, Tom?"

Tom blinked, realizing that he hadn't said a word for several minutes. He put on his most innocent smile. "Oh, nothing, Captain. Though I'm hoping I didn't step on your toes?"

"Not at all." Kathryn was wondering just what he was up to now. But the waltz was winding down, and he was heading over to Chakotay and B'Elanna. She automatically followed, determined to get to the bottom of whatever had put that sly glint she recognized in his eyes. She caught up to him a few meters away from the other couple, just as he turned back to her.

"I know us being happy makes you happy, but if an opportunity for just yourself comes along, don't let it get away." Tom seemed to not notice her raised eyebrow as he added, "If I'd done that, I'd still be back in Auckland."

Without giving her a chance to answer, he turned to cross the last few meters and tap Chakotay on the shoulder. "Okay, you've had your fun. I'd like my bride back now."

"Well, it's about _time_ you came back for me." B'Elanna's mock offended tone didn't fool anyone within earshot as she stepped away from Chakotay and took the hand Tom was offering.

"You know I'd always come back for you." He stole a kiss and then led her away into a waltz as a new song began.

Chakotay turned to Kathryn and shared an amused smile with her. "I guess I'm left with no other option." The teasing twinkle in his eyes grew as he was treated to a mild version of her famous glare. "Shall we dance, Captain?"

"'No other option', Commander? Perhaps I should refuse." His only response was the widening of his smile. "Or perhaps I should ask Ensign Brewster to dance instead?"

As if she were serious, she turned just enough in the direction of the young science officer, who was watching the others dance. When their eyes met, she smiled encouragingly at him. Brewster's eyes widened and he quickly turned his attention elsewhere.

Kathryn turned back to Chakotay, who was grinning. "Didn't you _tell_ him I don't bite?"

"Twice in the last year." Brewster's fear of her was a private joke between them.

"Then, I guess I'm all yours, Commander." Her smile matched his own as she took his hand and they fell into the slow steps of the waltz.

"I guess you were right after all," he said to her after a long minute. "I can see how well they compliment each other."

Kathryn gave him her "I told you so" look, but she was smiling. "Well, at least you and Tom will stop being at each other's throats," she teased.

"I think if we kept it up, B'Elanna would tear our hearts out and make us eat them."

She had to laugh. "That would be a little drastic, don't you think?"

"B'Elanna never does anything halfway, as we both know."

"True."

The waltz faded into an old song about here and now, the singer's voice deep and hypnotic. It felt almost spell-like, Kathryn thought--the melody combined with the gentle swaying of their steps, and Chakotay's hand warm on her back. She could get used to this too easily. But unlike before, the little warning voice inside wasn't trying to squelch those thoughts....

"--away already."

Kathryn blinked. "Hm?"

"Our newlyweds--they've escaped."

She glanced in the direction she'd last seen Tom and B'Elanna. Sure enough, they were gone. "Already?" she said in amusement.

"When have you ever known Paris to be patient about anything?"

"And it doesn't bother you?" She raised an eyebrow at him, but there was still a smile on her face.

His expression was quizzical for the briefest of moments before he chuckled. "Now, Kathryn, the whole ship knows they didn't wait for the honeymoon. B'Elanna can take care of herself." He fell silent, then added, "But if he hurts her in any way, I will not hesitate to throw him out the nearest airlock."

She gave him a mild look of rebuke, which of course he pretended not to notice. "You know as well as I do that he's not going to do anything of the sort." At his skeptical glance, her smile returned. "Besides, you wouldn't get the chance. B'Elanna would kill him first."

"And not quickly, either." He had to grin at the light slap on the shoulder she gave him.

"Aren't we supposed to be dancing, Commander?" She meant the comment to be humorous and was a little surprised to see his eyes widen and his cheeks darken with a slight blush. He murmured an apology and fell quiet, leaving her to ponder his reaction while they danced.

The music wrapped around him, making him feel like he and Kathryn were the only two on the holodeck.   He knew he was destined only to look and never to touch, but that didn't mean he couldn't dream of more. Like having a day such as this for the two of them....

"--so how about it?"

Chakotay blinked, realizing she'd been talking to him the whole time he'd been woolgathering. She realized it too and poked him in the shoulder. "You weren't listening, were you?"

"I'm afraid I wasn't," he admitted sheepishly.

"I was asking if you wanted to have dinner with me tomorrow evening. Considering the fact that we missed a few while having to deal with the Malon and all, we should start making up for lost time, don't you think?"

"I'd love to, Kathryn."

"Then it's a date."

"It is," he replied softly.

They fell silent as the music changed yet again, this time to a Caitian _dyranigo_ , which was a slightly faster-paced dance--and one that only a Caitian could be good at. Non-Caitians could dance it passably well, but neither Kathryn nor Chakotay were any good at it. They exchanged another smile at the mutual thought and headed off the floor, barely missing being knocked over as Freddy Bristow spun Renlay Sharr out and tried catching her with the tips of his fingers. Luckily, he succeeded before Sharr fell over.

"And _that_ is why I will never be able to dance a _dyranigo,"_ Kathryn pointed out. "I'm not even wearing heels and I'd fall for sure if I tried that move."

"Sharr is a pretty good dancer," Chakotay remarked. "But after my own attempts at it, I've come to the conclusion that it's made only for Caitian abilities."

"Very true."

"You know, now that B'Elanna and Tom are gone, perhaps we should get going ourselves." At her curious look, he gave her a full-dimpled grin. "You know they won't really start the party until we both leave. We should give them a break and make ourselves scarce."

"I suppose you're right," she said ruefully. _Like Phoebe and I wouldn't really have fun until we were sure we'd be by ourselves with no parents around._ She'd come to accept the fact that the crew took the place of her children, since it was becoming far less likely with each passing day that she'd ever have her own. She accepted the arm Chakotay offered her and they headed for the door, saying goodbye to those they passed that weren't on the dance floor. They paused briefly to talk to Ensign Harper and Neelix, who were both currently sitting out the _dyranigo_ as well, and thank them again for their catering skills. As they reached the holodeck doors a few minutes later, Kathryn heard a whoop from somewhere behind them and, meeting her first officer's eyes, shared a laugh with him.

"Just like when we were kids, couldn't wait til the parents left to let loose."

"Except most of the kids have duty in the morning."

"Oh, I expect the Doctor will file a report with me complaining about the number of people coming in for hangover cures," Kathryn predicted with a roll of her eyes. "After five years, he shouldn't expect anything less...."

"But he complains anyway," Chakotay finished.

"Mhm." They had reached the turbolift and stepped inside. "Deck three."

A familiar, comfortable silence settled over them during the lift ride, each lost in their own thoughts. Kathryn was so busy mulling over Tom's earlier words that they were standing at the door to her quarters in what seemed like mere seconds.

"What time would be good tomorrow?"

"1900?"

"Sounds good."

"Then I'll see you tomorrow." She gave him a final smile before the doors closed between them.

 

****=/\=**   **=/\=**   **=/\=**   **=/\=****

 

At 1845 the next evening, Kathryn was preparing for Chakotay's arrival. The table was set already, as always. Now all she had to do was finish fixing her hair, and when he arrived, replicate dinner. The latter would be nothing more than a simple command to the computer. The former, however, was becoming a problem.

When _hadn't_ her hair been a hassle? This seemed to happen every time she was preparing for something important--or any time she was running late. Annoyed, she tore a brush through it, attempting to bring it to some semblance of order. She was _not_ going to greet her first officer at the door with her hair out of place.

Five minutes later, she glared at her reflection and decided it would do. And just in time, too--the doorchime sounded. She hurried back out into the main room of her quarters. "Come in."

The doors parted to admit Chakotay, who had changed out of uniform and into one of his usual off-duty outfits of dark brown slacks and a cream colored tunic. The basic colors and minimal design only emphasized his dark good looks and Kathryn was hard-pressed not to stare.

For a long moment, Chakotay stood there silently and admired the lovely vision of his captain. He was mildly surprised to see that she'd discarded the uniform for a simple but classic sea-green dress, its skirt falling to just below the knees in soft pleats. The color seemed to make her eyes bluer. Her hair framed her face as it always did and he couldn't help picturing her with it long again. Secretly, he hoped she might grow it back out some day.

Finally, he found his voice. "You look beautiful, Kathryn."

"You look pretty good yourself, Chakotay." Startled by her bold words, she felt a light blush steal across her cheeks.

He had obviously noticed that from the grin he was wearing. "So what's for dinner?"

"Dinner?" she repeated, putting on a confused look. "I don't recall mentioning dinner." She tried and failed to bite back her escaping smile.

"You'd make me go hungry?"

"I never said that."

He saw her hands reaching for her hips and had to fight not to laugh, but his grin only got bigger. "Well, I suppose that means I'm stuck with bread and peanut butter. Luckily, I know where you keep it."

"You go near that cabinet...." Her command tone had slipped into her voice despite their charade and she was hard pressed not to give in to laughter herself.

"And what? You'll put me in the brig?" Chakotay's gaze slid from hers to the cabinet in question and back again. His eyebrows rose in curiosity. "Just what are you hiding in there anyway?"

They eyed each other for an eternal minute--mock glare to mocking grin. Finally, Kathryn gave in to the laughter that was bubbling up inside, even while shaking her head at him. "You're impossible, you know that?"

His laughter echoed hers, the dimples in full evidence. "But you love me that way."

The word "love" caught her off guard and her bright smile faded into an unreadable look. His smile faded too and, for a moment, he thought he might have offended her. But she turned a softer smile on and gestured him towards the waiting table, the awkward moment past, and moved towards the replicator.

Dinner was as it always had been between them--ship's business mixed with casual conversation. But this time, the atmosphere seemed different--a kind of different Kathryn couldn't quite name. Tom's words from the day before came to the front of her mind and she realized that was the difference. That and the absence of her mental voice of warning. By the time they'd moved to the couch to try the wine, both of them were in their normal state of almost complete relaxation.

"I wonder how many other weddings I'll be asked to officiate this year," Kathryn remarked as she settled on one end of the couch.

"As if the rumor mill weren't full already," Chakotay said with a smile as he settled next to her. "Though I think I could safely bet on at least one couple."

"Oh?"

"Our resident Bolians."

"I did notice them in each other's company throughout most of the reception." She reached for the wine bottle, carefully working the stopper out.

"Chell's quite taken with her. He's talked of little else for the past two months." Chakotay took the glass of wine she held out to him. " _And_ I overheard Golwat talking to Harper and Nicoletti at the reception--that, among other things, she finds Chell 'enchanting'."

"That's a good start," Kathryn smiled. "I hope it works out for them." The silence lingered and they found themselves equally at a loss for words. Finally, to end the awkward moment, she picked up her wine glass.   When their eyes met, he angled his glass slightly towards hers.

"To our friendship, Kathryn."

"To our friendship," she echoed softly, touching the rim of her glass to his lightly. She then tore her gaze away from his, suddenly feeling warm all over. She sipped the wine for a few minutes while looking out her viewport at the stars streaking by outside. When she glanced back at Chakotay, he was looking over in the direction of the wall shelf that held a few of her personal sentimental items.

"I see you kept the rose I gave you two years ago."

Kathryn's gaze drifted to the peace rose, safely enclosed in its stasis box, sitting on the shelf's exact center point. She'd replicated the stasis box only a few days after he'd given her the rose, not having the heart to watch it wilt and fall apart.

Unbidden, the false memories the matrix alien had given her crept to the front of her thoughts. Watching in confusion and then disbelief as Chakotay had tried to resuscitate her and, upon thinking he'd failed, he'd crushed her to his chest and screamed his denial to the raging storms above. The raw anguish in his voice when he'd told Tuvok she was dead. The look in his eyes when the Doctor had officially declared her gone....

Truth be told, Chakotay was surprised she'd kept the rose. He had seen it two days after giving it to her, displayed in a vase on the table during their weekly dinner. But the week after, it was gone and he'd just assumed it had already wilted. Roses were never long-lived, especially in the recycled air of a starship's environment.

And there was something sitting on top of the box--what appeared to be a rock. He couldn't tell what color it was--it seemed to be all colors at once, changing every time he blinked. "Is that one of those prism stones Neelix found at that market on Quanta VI?" he asked, referring to their most recent shoreleave and supply stop three weeks ago. When she didn't answer, he glanced at her and realized she was still staring at the rose, unblinking. "Kathryn?"

Kathryn blinked, shaking herself out of her drifting thoughts and meeting his eyes with a small smile. "I'm sorry, Chakotay, I don't know where my mind was. What did you say?"

"That rock on top of the stasis box....is that a prism stone?"

Instead of answering his question, she set down her wine glass and rose to her feet, crossing the room to retrieve the object in question. Coming back, she sat down next to Chakotay and carefully opened her hand.

"A rainbow," he said in surprise.

Her smile grew.

"May I?"

She nodded and set the figurine in his hand. The little glass rainbow, about an inch or so high and two and a half to three inches long seemed dwarfed even more while resting in Chakotay's palm. It had each of the seven colors in it and had two half-clouds, one on each end, for its base. It sparkled brightly under the lights.

"My father gave it to me when I was only three years old."

"It's held up through all the battles and beatings Voyager has taken?" he said in amazement.

Kathryn had to laugh at that remark, then her laughter faded into a quiet smile. "It's a tough little rainbow," she said, running a fingertip lightly over the arch.

"So what meaning does the rainbow have? Or is it just a present from your father?"

"Actually, my father gave me my own little fairy tale that went with the rainbow. It wasn't just _any_ rainbow--it was 'my' rainbow. 'That's Kathryn's rainbow', he would tell my sister. 'No one but she can touch it, or it will lose its magic.'"

"A magic rainbow, hmm?" He had to smile at that, knowing her strictly scientific mind--one that she'd admitted she'd had from a very young age, and tried to picture her accepting the idea of a magical rainbow all her own.

"That's what he taught me to believe when I was little." Her smile grew wistful at the memory. "He used to say...." She paused, her smile suddenly fading for a long minute. For a long minute, she seemed lost in thought. But her control soon returned and she picked up the thread of her explanation. "He used to say to me, 'Your rainbow is a magical rainbow. It holds the magic of love. For when you grow up, there will be a special man awaiting you--and he will be your love at the end of the rainbow.' And I would say, 'But I thought pots of gold were at the ends of rainbows.' To which my father would reply, 'Your rainbow is different. At the end of yours is love, which is much more precious than gold.'"

Kathryn paused, suddenly at a loss for words. Chakotay handed her the rainbow and she took it. She stared at it silently for several minutes before speaking again.

"I used to think Justin was that man. But when he and my father died on Tau Ceti Prime, I lost faith in everything that I had known." She shrugged slightly. "Of course, I knew that he made it all up. But there was still some little part of me that always wanted to believe in the rainbow's 'magic'."

She carefully set the little rainbow down on the table in front of them, then sighed. Looking up at Chakotay, she tilted her head slightly to the side. "Am I making sense?"

He nodded. "Perfect sense."

Kathryn smiled sadly. "You always understand me, Chakotay. How do you do that?"

"I guess it's because I know you so well." He reached out a hand to lightly touch her cheek.

Kathryn was startled by his tender touch, then realized that she shouldn't be. Deep down, she knew how he felt about her. She also knew that she spent much of her time denying how deeply she felt for him in return.

Why _had_ she denied herself the chance she deserved to have? As Q had so bluntly pointed out two years ago, she wasn't getting any younger. When they'd landed in the Delta Quadrant, she'd taken it for granted that they'd find a way back within a few months, at most. As time passed, she grew to accept the fact that it would take longer--and had put her wishes and private dreams aside in order to focus on the rest of the crew. But had that sacrifice come at too high a price?

 _If an opportunity for just yourself comes along, don't let it get away._ Tom's words rose to the forefront of her mind, and she wondered if he had been referring to a moment such as this--if he _knew...._

But she could fulfill those dreams now. She instinctively knew Chakotay would give her that--and more. So what was holding her back? Regulations? Protocol?

 _Protocol be damned_ , her heart said fiercely. _I'm tired of holding back.  
_

She looked up at Chakotay. His expression had changed--becoming more serious.

"Kathryn." He was getting closer--and closer still. Close enough to kiss....

First contact was tentative, testing the waters. A gentle skimming, brushing against the other's lips, drawing back and then leaning in once more, lingering longer on each return. Gentle fingertips caressed her jawline, eliciting a faint shiver that began to creep down her spine. He brought his other hand up, cupping her face as he deepened the kiss.

The faint shivers were quick to build, stirring up even stronger sensations. She hadn't been kissed like this since....since....a quick search of her memory told her _never_. They had parted again and he was gazing at her now, his dark eyes even darker with emotions he rarely dared to show more than a glimpse of. Then his hand moved around to the back of her head, fingertips grazing the nape of her neck, once more pulling her to him.

He had never thought he would have the chance to do this--to kiss her, to bring her into his arms, to touch her in any fashion beyond that of friendship. His lips moved from hers to nuzzle her neck, then trace a slow path down to the hollow of her throat--which caused her to gasp and murmur his name. And he couldn't remember the last time he'd wanted someone as much as he wanted her now....

She didn't remember him pulling them to their feet, or her guiding him slowly into her bedroom. She was only aware of his touch and the fire it was igniting inside her. His lips on her face, on her neck. His hands in her hair, on her shoulders, and now moving to her back. She felt him sliding her dress away; she in turn removing his tunic. Barriers removed one by one until nothing remained. Momentarily feeling shame, she tried to turn her eyes from his, but he would not allow it.

"Beautiful....Kathryn, how beautiful you are...."

His arms were now lowering her to the bed, hands moving to cup her breasts before he leaned down to capture them with his mouth. First one, then the other, giving each equal attention. She moaned, digging her fingers into his neck. When he finally released her, she moved to bestow the same treatment upon him, her lips tracing random patterns across his chest until he pulled away.

"Enough, Kathryn." His voice was a harsh whisper. "Or I won't be able to hold back."

She lifted her eyes to his. They had gone almost black with the combination of love and lust reflected there, a look that caused the slow burning inside her to rise higher.

"Then don't hold back, Chakotay."

He lowered her to lie down once more, his lips coming down hard on hers, his weight settling atop her. She could feel his arousal pressed between them and reached for him, but only got in a brief touch before he pulled her hand away. Breaking away from her lips, he trailed a line of kisses down the length of her body, pausing as he reached her hip. His eyes met hers, silently asking permission.

She was drowning in the heat she saw in his eyes, quivering under the touch of his fingers as they caressed her thighs, and finally the ache centered between them. When his mouth replaced his hands, she let out a sharp cry of surprise. Her hands tangled in his hair but only held there for a few seconds before he caught her wrists, gently pinning them down at her sides. The slow burn was becoming a firestorm, and her cries only encouraged him further. But then he was pulling away once more...and she was so close....

"No...."

"Shh...." He caught the hand that blindly reached out for him, pressing a kiss into its palm. "No rushing, Kathryn. Let me love you slowly."

He tilted her head up for another kiss and she wrapped her arms around him, pulling him as close as she could. She was aware of feeling his heat pressed between them, and then a sharp twinge of pain as he began to ease inside her. She tried to ignore the pain, despite her soft cry and the digging of her nails into his shoulders. He soothed her with whispered words of love and it began to fade as they moved together, an almost gentle rocking of their bodies. He was memorizing her face with tender kisses, but came back to meet her lips again and again. The firestorm was raging full force now as she whimpered in desperation, writhing beneath him to meet his every thrust.

"Chakotay!" Her cry was a plea as the sensations coursing through her all blurred into one, striking her with a fierce blaze of heat and sending her tumbling headlong into the abyss.

"Kath-ryn!" His groan was a benediction and he crushed her to him at the feel of her tightening around him, exploding inside her.

They lay together for some time, panting and shaking, before he turned them on their sides. His hand trailed gently down her spine, then along her arm. She turned her hand to his and laced their fingers together. Their lips met once more, countless long and soul-stirring kisses that slowly faded to a gentle brushing of the lips, ending as they had begun. A strange feeling of contentment had settled over her. He brushed a tender kiss over her brow, sending a slight tingle through their joined fingers. Only here, now, with _him_ , had she ever felt like this.

Kathryn wasn't aware of when she felt the lassitude become weariness until she realized she could barely keep her eyes open. When finally they closed, she felt herself drifting for a moment, still aware of Chakotay cradling her against him, before all awareness began to fade.

_Kathryn looked at the little glass rainbow in her hands. "Magic, Daddy?"_

_"Yes, Goldenbird, your rainbow is a magical rainbow. It holds the magic of love."  
_

_"But...I thought pots of gold were at the end of rainbows."  
_

_"Ah, but that's why_ your _rainbow is so special, Kathryn. For when you grow up, there will be a special man awaiting you...a love more precious than gold."_

At long last, she had found her love at the end of the rainbow.

 

***fin***

 

 


End file.
